"Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves even when we risk disappointing others." - Brené Brown
Having healthy boundaries in our lives are necessary because they ensure that our friendships and relationships are mutually respectful, supportive, and kind. Boundaries are a measure of self-esteem and self-worth and they set the basic guidelines for how we want to be treated. Setting boundaries however, isn't the easiest thing to do. In fact, many people feel guilty and uncomfortable when they express their our own needs and desires.
Healthy boundaries are also an important component of self-care. It's how we respect ourselves, and in turn, the way in which we receive respect from others. When we neglect to set boundaries, in essence, we are unconsciously giving permission for others to take advantage of us. This creates patterns of unpleasant experiences and relationships that leave us feeling resentful, depleted, angry, and frustrated.
There is a well known quote that says, "we teach people how to treat us." And what a truth that is! The more we "accept" things that we're not okay with, the more we show someone what they are "allowed" to do. Setting healthy boundaries can have many benefits, including the well-being of your mind, your heart, and your physical health. When you start saying "no" to what doesn't serve you, and "yes" to all that does, you will find your level of confidence increases as well as your self-esteem.
I've shared with you six ways to create healthy boundaries, I hope they help you too.
Clarity is power
You can’t set healthy boundaries if you’re unsure what your own needs and desires are. So, the key is to get clear on what feels right for you, and what feels wrong for you. How do you want to be spoken to? How do you want to be treated? What makes you uncomfortable, stressed, or anxious? These feelings will help you establish what your limits are. Start by making a list of your values, of what's important to you, write down how you want to be treated, and from there any time your values and boundaries aren't being respected, you can communicate with more clarity and confidence because you have been clear on what you will and will not tolerate.
Each time I honour my boundaries I feel more and more confident to express my needs and create space for my desires.
Learn to say no
The word "no," is a complete sentence, but the truth is, this simple two letter word can be quite daunting and stressful to say to others. This is because we have often been met with guilt and poor reactions when we have said "no" to someone who is wanting something from us. So in order to avoid confrontation and people thinking "badly" of us, we appease them and do something we desperately do not want to do. Then the resistance and resentment sinks in and we are left feeling depleted and disrespected. Maybe even taken advantage of. We also feel frustrated with ourselves because we said "yes" when our heart was calling out, NO! Here's something you need to know, when someone asks you to do something and you say no, they are going to move onto the next person. They may even forget they asked you in the first place. And when you actually start saying no, people will respect you, IF they respect themselves. If they don't, they don't deserve your time and energy. Say what you really want to say and don't feel the need to justify or explain yourself. If something doesn't align with your energy, or serve you, don't do it.
Setting boundaries is a normal part of my every day life.
The Universe is full of abundance, you can find it everywhere you go, and everywhere you look. The truth is, many of us focus on all the things we don't have, instead of focusing on all the things we do have. When we focus on what we don't have, we tend to live in a state of lack with the desire to accumulate more and more in material things, never feeling satisfied or content. However taking time to recognize and acknowledge all the blessings you do have, will create an abundant mindset that will leave you feeling like you have enough, and that you are enough. This beautiful state will bring you more freedom, joy, and inner peace.
Here are Six things you can do to attract more abundance in your life.
Develop an attitude of gratitude for everything in your life
Begin to experience more abundance right now by being thankful for all the blessings you already have. Whether it's your lovely home, your friendships, your children and your partner, the heat that warms your home, the food you eat, or the water you drink, whatever it may be, be thankful. When you begin to cultivate an attitude of gratitude, you eventually become this state and in turn, you feel overly appreciative for even the smallest of things. The more you practice this "gratitude mindset" the more beauty and abundance you will see, and experience, every single day. The sunrises will seem brighter, the trees will appear more green, even your foods will taste better when you stop in the present moment and are thankful for every experience you encounter. You can also begin by offering appreciation each morning and being thankful for all that you have in your life, and all that you are.
“I am living my life in a state of complete abundance.”
Generosity is key
Don't stop the flow of abundant energy by keeping it all to yourself. Give! Trust me, the more you give, the more you get, and that doesn't mean you get more in material things, what it means is, when you give, you are giving from a place of love, and in return, you receive the "energy of love." This is how the Universe keeps itself in Karmic Balance. Have you ever noticed that when you engage in an act of kindness, you have this overwhelming feeling of joy? Well, that's the Universe rewarding you for your act of love, and the person on the receiving end will experience a similar feeling. It's not about what you give, it's in the act itself that is rewarding. Keep the abundance flowing so that it circulates back to you and allow the ebb and flow of this energy to do its thing. The more you practice giving, the more you'll stay in vibratory harmony with the all-giving Source of everything.
"The wealth of the universe is circulating in my life and flowing to me in abundant and prosperous ways.”
What is Self Love anyway, and what exactly does it mean? Self Love means, loving and caring for yourself like you do someone you love. It means holding space for yourself from a place of love, compassion, empathy, and non-judgment. It's also doing healthy things for yourself that foster and nourish your mind, body, soul, and spirit.
Love for self is so important, yet many of us don't give to ourselves the way we give to others. Why is that? Why do we not feel deserving or worthy of our own love? Well, it can be for many reasons, maybe we weren't loved the way we needed to be as a child and so we carried this unconscious belief that we aren't worthy of good, healthy, and healing love. Maybe it's because we give to others so much of our lives, that we just don't know how to receive the very thing we give. Whatever the reason, it can be changed, and you can learn to love yourself more by engaging in some of the suggestions I have shared below.
First thing I want you to know is that you are, without a doubt, worthy of the greatest love of all and it's up to you to give yourself what you innately need and desire. When you love and accept yourself for all that you are, you build a strong sense of confidence that is unwavering and unstoppable. It's beyond powerful. Believe me, I've been there, I've done the work, and now here I am sharing with you. I'm also still a work in progress, as we all are, but for me, it's not about perfection, it's about learning and growing as we go, and doing the very best we can from where we are.
Creating a magical morning routine is essential to achieving a successful and abundant life. Waking up a little bit earlier than usual will give you more time to focus on your goals as you begin the day with more energy, ease, and peace. A morning routine can help reduce stress levels, improve mental clarity, and soothe any anxieties you may be experiencing as you start your day. Having a more structured morning helps you set the tone for the day, and allows you to control your schedule, rather than having your schedule control you. As you start each day feeling fresh and energized, you can better focus on the tasks ahead and where you need to prioritize and place your time and energy. This will not only increase your productivity throughout the day, but it will increase your self confidence as well. It's a win win!
This is a new beginning to a more energetic, productive, and abundant life. Plus the great news is, you do can all the things I suggested below while still in bed! Perfect right!
Added benefits to creating a magical morning routine:
- It reduces stress levels and allows you to ease into your day feeling more grounded
- You gain more time so you're not rushing around and forgetting things or running late
- You're taking good care of your mind, body, and soul, which is so important
- You will give yourself adequate time to make healthy choices for breakfast
Here are six ways you can create a magical morning routine.
I'm big on offering words of gratitude as soon as I wake up. The fact that I received another day on this earth is something to be thankful for in itself. You don't need to spend a lot of time on this one, it's simply a matter of saying, or writing in a journal, a few things you are grateful for. It can be anything from your comfy warm bed, to the vehicle you have that gets you to your work place. Once you start finding things to be grateful for, you will find even more things. The list really is endless! This not only helps you start your day off on a more joyful note, but the more you are thankful for your blessings, the more you begin to live in a state of gratitude. This state will leave you feeling overly appreciative for even the smallest of things, and it will also increase a feeling of abundance overflowing in your heart.
"My life is a gift. I will use this gift with confidence, joy, and exuberance."
Do some light stretches in bed
Starting your morning off by doing a few light stretches has many health benefits. Not only does it relieve tension in your muscles, but it gets the blood flowing to the body including the brain. Morning stretches can also be helpful when it comes to alleviating aches and pains in your joints and muscles as this tends to happen after the body has been at rest for a long period of time. Light stretching provides your body with more energy and can prevent lethargy and feelings of fatigue. Here is a great article that shares ten stretches you can do in bed. Article.
"Today I align myself with freedom, growth, and joy."
I realized many years ago that true success is created and cultivated from within. It is not defined by the size of our house or the kind of car we drive, true success is found in the richness of our life experiences and in the smiles of those we love. It’s important to know this because it helps us understand that success isn’t something we need to constantly chase or strive for externally, true success is found within, and it's from having gratitude for all that we already have.
I’m sharing with you six secrets plus one bonus secret to achieving success from the inside out.
Successful people take risks. They live in the space of possibility and greatness and they are not afraid to step outside their comfort zone. One who takes risks doesn’t believe in failure, in fact they see failure as an opportunity to learn and grow, and to do things differently and better than before. They are fuelled by their passions and they burn their own trail instead of following the foot steps of others. They are inspired by those who push the boundaries of possibility and reach beyond themselves in order to achieve greatness. If you want to become successful in your personal, business, or spiritual pursuits, you will need to muster up the courage to take risks that can potentially catapult you towards your desired outcomes.
“I continuously push myself to learn and develop in areas of life that bring me happiness, freedom, and purpose.”
Always be authentic
To obtain the highest form of success in all areas of your life, it’s important to remain authentic and true to yourself. If you operate from any other frequency people will feel that vibe in all things you do. They will feel the inauthentic energy that you are giving off and this “vibe” may turn people away. When you choose to show up in life as who you truly are, at the very core of your heart and soul, you will find people gravitate towards your energy because it feels good and it feels real, and people appreciate people who keep it real. So be yourself and allow those who are drawn to you, to come to you.
“I acknowledge my own self-worth and my self-confidence is rising.”